Why does love pass me by?

Everyone seems to be looking for love but most of us can't seem to find it. 
Could it be that we look for it in the wrong place? Or our approach is not correct, or maybe what we seek something else but we mistakenly call it love?
Even when love is within our grasp we are afraid to love, because we are scared of getting hurt. 

Love can never hurt, but unfulfilled expectations can cause much unhappiness and hurt.

Love is a giving, an unconditional giving. You do not know why, but you simply give. A good example would be, a mother's love for her child.

Any explanation of love is futile. Love is a matter of the heart and not a subject for the mind to analyse, love therefore defies explanation. 
Love is not logical, it cannot be. That is why normal people rarely experience love. You have to be a bit foolish and even more innocent to experience love.

Our disappointment with 'Love' arises out of two reasons, trading and possessiveness.


We humans are clever, very clever, we want to take and rarely give. Sometimes we give, but only with an eye on getting something back in return. When we do this it could be called trading. We give affection and 'love' wanting something we call 'love' in return. This is not love it is a deal. Deals are transactional and generally unsatisfying.

Love is probably the greatest feeling one can experience, it is beautiful, in truth it's exhilarating. 

The other thing that ruins love is our possessiveness. The greatest disappointment in life appears to be unreciprocated affection or our inability to possess the object or person of our love.

"I love you so you have got to love me. You cannot love anyone else."

This possessiveness leads us to do strange things and demand impossible loyalties. Placing absurd and unnatural expectations on the person of our love, we make them actually dull and ugly making them undesirable and therefore unlovable.

Anyone worth possessing, simply cannot be possessed.



What would happen if you took a beautiful flower and closed it into a box? The flower would wither and die very quickly. 
What would happen if you took the sweet water from a spring and put it into a bottle for a long time? The water would become stale and smell foul. 
What would happen if you captured a beautiful bird and put it into a cage? It would neither have beautiful flight, nor spread its glorious wings nor will it sing beautifully as it did when it was free.




Love is a gift, and if it is true, seeks nothing in return.

If you want to love then do so unconditionally and with your heart and not your mind. Be like the sun radiate, give energy and bring life to all you see and meet and expect nothing in return and you shall transcend from a planet to a star and from man to God.

May I have your autograph?

It was two years ago when our son Pavit was in Mumbai and dropped in  at the Bharat Petroleum pump on Bandra Linking road to meet his young uncle Amarprit Sawhney (Amar).  They chatted for a while when they were interrupted by one of the employees. The employee was asking for permission to leave to go to the home of one of legendary Indian cricketer Sachin Tendulkar.

Sachin possessed a Ferrari car gifted to him by the Fiat company for Sachin's outstanding performance in one of the tournaments. The vehicle needed special fuel to operate and this was  supplied by the oil giant Bharat Petroleum (BPCL).  Amar's petrol station is well reputed for its excellent service and efficiency, therefore BPCL had requested Amar to personally take care of the select prestigious clients, such as Sachin Tendulkar.

Amar asked Pavit if he would like to meet Mr. Tendulkar.
Which right thinking youngster n India could turn down such an invitation?

They loaded the special fuel into the vehicle and they set off for Sachin's home.
As luck would have it, while the technician did the check up and pumped the fuel, Sachin strolled out from his house.

After exchanging greetings, they began to chat. Pavit recalls how modest and soft spoken the great cricketer was. They chatted about many things and then Pavit asked Sachin "I would have thought you more comfortable in a Mercedes car rather than in the simple cars parked in your driveway."

Sachin responded "We Tendulkars are simple folks, we believe in simple living." I have been presented with many cars icluding 37 Mercedes cars."
Pavit asked "Thirty seven Mercedes cars? How do you manage so many cars? Where do you fit them?"
Sachin replied " I do not  need to fit them. I have gifted them all to friends and relatives. You cannot believe how happy it made them and how much I enjoyed sharing my things with people I love."

He then offered Pavit to sit in the Ferrari. Pavit was ecstatic with the experience.
After a while as Pavit and Amar  were leaving. Pavit could't resist asking Sachin for an autograph. When Sachin saw that Pavit had nothing to take the autograph on he smiled and said "Wait here, I will be right back."
Sachin returned a few minutes later with a note book pulled out a leaf  and autographed it in front of Pavit.

Gushing with excitement at having met such a great and true man. He called us up at home to share the experience.

When he returned home,  he narrated his experience to us in great detail.  I asked to see the autograph. He sheepishly said "I don't have it, I gave it to a friend."
Mohit his elder brother screamed at him " Are you crazy? Why did you do such a daft thing?"

Pavit said " I learnt many things from Sachin Tendulkar in the short time I was able to spend with him. I gave the autograph to my friend Akhil because it would mean so much to him"

It was another day for us to learn so much more about friendship, modesty and greatness.

What do we discuss?

Great     minds discuss ideas;
Average minds discuss events;
Small     minds discuss people.


   -  Eleanor Roosevelt

Akbar the Moghul Emperor was actually poor

Emperor Akbar (1542 to 1605) is acclaimed to be one of India's wealthiest Mogul emperors.  Was he really that rich? An interesting incident and the emperor's own comments will let you decide.

During the reign of Akbar there also lived a Baba ji, a 'Pir'. In the Sufi path, Pir literally meaning 'old man' is a saint, whose role is to guide and provide spiritual guidance to his disciples.

Many Babas  in India are revered by Sikhs, Hindus and Muslims. Notable Babaji's like Farid ji's teachings are enshrined as one of the fifteen 'Bhagats' (Devotees) within Sikhism and his selected works form part of the Guru Granth Sahib, the Sikh sacred scripture

Wise emperors often seek spiritual guidance, and so did Akbar. He sometimes visited a certain Baba at his village to seek spiritual guidance.

One day the villagers where Baba ji stayed , asked a favour of him.
They said " Baba ji, the emperor visits you so often can you do us poor villagers a great favour?". "The village has no school nor any in the near vicinity, can you ask the Shehan Shah to build us a school?"

Baba ji agreed that he would ask the favour of the emperor on Akbar's next visit to him.
Then he thought for a while and said "This is a noble work, let me not delay it. I myself will travel to Akbar's palace and meet him."

When Baba ji, arrived at Akbar's palace the guards recognised him as he walked up to the palace gates.
They informed him that the emperor had gone to offer his prayers at his private mosque.

Baba ji, walked up the mosque and stood behind the emperor. The prayers were almost complete and Akbar made his ‘fariyad’ (cry for help) God, "Allah!, great, and merciful, give me more power, expand my kingdom's borders and give me more wealth"

On hearing his prayer Baba ji, turned around and immediately left the mosque.

Since it was at the end of his prayer Akbar had sensed that someone had been present behind him. He turned around when he had finished his prayers and saw Baba ji heading towards the palace gate. 

Akbar hurried to Baba ji, bowed to him and asked " Welcome Baba. why have you come and why are you leaving?"

Baba looked at Akbar and said " I came here because I thought you to be rich. I came here to ask you for money to build a school in the village."

He continued " I heard your prayers and realised that you are poor for you are still hungry. It is against my beliefs to ask anything from a poor man."

" Do not worry, I will go to the village and collect some money for you", concluded Baba ji and he strode away.

This incident was not known to anyone except Akbar and Baba ji. It came to light when it was narrated by the emperor himself in '_Akbarnama_' the biography of Akbar He wrote, "On that day I realised how empty and useless I was. I had wasted my whole life in pursuing and acquiring useless things."

Akbar was a benevolent ruler who cared for all his subjects. Yet this incident was a further pivotal point in Akbar's life, for he realised for the first time in his life, that though he had great wealth, he was in fact a poor man.

He is rich who is. He who remains unfulfilled, hungry and thirsty, desiring more and more things, wealth and power is poor.