Third Places and Vibrant Communities

Humans are social animals who band together in cohesive groups called tribes or communities. This provides safety, companionship, pleasure, learning, livelihood and profit to individuals.

Typically a community comprises about 500 to 1000 individuals, connected to each by factors, such as, religious faith, profession, extended family, sport, politics, etc.

Communities vitally need venues where people can meet in a neutral environment and in an informal manner for individuals to socialise. Such a venue we could call as **'third place.'**

The first place is where people reside, at their homes, the second place is where people go to work, and the third place is where people go to socialise.

Communities with vibrant third places develop into centres of shared learning, art, culture, sport and the people enjoy a much higher standard of quality of life.

What are the requirements for a third place?

There are generally eight factors that are typical of third places. 

Neutral ground

Occupants of third places have little to no obligation to be there. They are not tied down to the area financially, politically, legally, or otherwise and are free to come and go as they please.

Leveler

Third places places no particular importance on an individual's economical or social status in a society. There are no prerequisites or requirements that would prevent acceptance or participation in the third place.

Community Kitchen

                                 

Conversation is main activity

Playful and happy conversation is the main but not the only activity in third places. The tone of conversation is usually light hearted and humorous; 

Accessibility and accommodation

Third places are open and readily accessible to those who occupy them. They are also accommodating, to meet the  wants of their inhabitants.

The regulars

Third places harbour a number of regulars that help give the space its tone, and help set the mood and characteristics of the area. Regulars assist newcomers to feel welcome and accommodated.

A low profile

Third places are characteristically wholesome. The inside of a third place is without extravagance or grandiosity, and has a homely feel. 

Football at Hotfut, Pune. India

The mood is playful
The tone of conversation in third places are never marked with tension or hostility. Instead, they have a playful nature, where witty conversation and frivolous banter are not only common, but highly valued.

A home away from home
Occupants of third places will often have the same feelings of warmth, possession, and belonging as they would in their own homes. They feel a piece of themselves is rooted in the space, and gain spiritual regeneration by spending time there.

Urban centres with large populations are mushrooming everywhere. People struggle to find third places which are becoming increasingly rare, if not extinct.

Intellectually and spiritually hollow people.

The desire of governments to monetise any and every available square meter of public space, makes it difficult if not impossible to create vibrant communities

It is no coincidence that the ‘helping professions’ are major and rapidly growing components of our economy as leaders and planners unwittingly help destroy local public life and communities.

Urban sprawl

Even where there are some third places available, people rarely find the time to socialise. 

Shifts from large joint to small nuclear families, non stop 24 hour work timings, has also taken a big toll on family and communities. 

Couple this with stress created by authorities, the total disregard by governments, town planners, encroachment, unsafe environments etc. has extensively damaged if not destroyed communities.

What are third places available to Indians? 

Places of religious worship are the most popular third places in India. They often provide the only succour available to people, for safe socialising. But the downside is that, religous leaders demand blind obedience and sometimes abuse the trust that this obedience provides.

The market place, village and town fairs, celebrating festivals, offer some form of community space. They may be fun, but do not satisfy fully the third place needs of individuals.

Harmandir Sahib,  The Golden Temple. Amritsar. 

Muslims at prayer

There are still some other third places left these days. Some which come to mind are, canteens, tea stalls, chapels, dhabas, play grounds, street corners, beach communities, prayer groups, etc. for the simple people. Then for others there are tea /coffee shops, bars and restaurants, sports and recreational clubs, sports facilities, etc.

Aufside bar and restaurant, Pune.

Social well-being and psychological health of individuals depend upon communities which can only exist where there are vibrant third places.

Third places are not a choice but are a vital necessity and a precondition for healthy communities. For they create habits of public association, and offer psychological support to individuals and communities.

 Nations are relatively a recent phenomenon. Historically the real building block of humanity and a successful civilisation is the family and community. 

Civilisations and governments should be judged by how well they satisfy the safety, livelihood, etc. needs and the quality of life of individuals and communities.

Third Places build strong and resilient communities, and that is the bedrock of a strong, tolerant, peaceful, healthy, vibrant, civilised world. And that is the best legacy we can leave our children.

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Written and posted by Gurvinder Singh
Ampav Education & Consulting Pvt. Ltd. website 
Pune. India

Ampav Education and Consulting is a Pune based organisation committed to evolving better ways to live, work and play. To support programs of the community, for the community, by the community. Please write to us

We would love for you to share your ideas and experiences with us. 

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Savouring Life

We all need challenges to enjoy life. 

Challenge gets our adrenaline flowing enabling us to either fight or take flight, and this in turn creates stress. Some level of stress is in fact healthy and even essential for  us to live exciting and interesting lives. However stress can often become addictive. As with all addictions we need greater and greater doses of excitement to get the same high.

One of the greatest stress creators is modern man's, need for speed. Our lives are running faster and faster, yet rarely do we arrive anywhere meaningful. 

Time is money we are told. Money for whom and what will you do with that money if you have lost your health, your sanity, and your self? We often have no time to enjoy life, nature, our families, our friends and precious moments we live. If we ever do realise our folly, it is often too late in life to do anything about it.

Life is not only to be lived, it has to be savoured. Unfortunately we have come to believe that only through money and power, can we enjoy life and be happy. That too if we have lots of it.

Many things in life can be enjoyed which money cannot afford to buy,  The love and company of family, friendship, sound sleep, good health, mother's cooking, wisdom, etc. etc. 

The sounds and smell of nature, the sun, rain, the breeze, the song of birds and the mischief of youth, the joy of play, music and dance, all these and many other things we increasingly miss in our lives.

When we travel fast we hardly ever notice the scenery and therefore can never admire it or the company of our co-travellers in life. When we zip through life we journey from cradle to the funeral pyre or grave, we hardly get to live. Mere existence is not living, its just existing.

Many years ago I went through a catastrophic personal and business setback. I struggled and I struggled and I struggled, until there was nothing more I could do. 

When all worldly doors close we seek a higher self within our own being. Through the doorway of our soul we seek to find answers and solutions. Eventually, exhausted, I surrendered to God's will. I stopped struggling and that led an awakening.

Now I had time to look within. I now had time to do all the things I should have done all my life, and somehow forgotten to do because I was 'too busy'.

I found I had time to reflect, meditate, pray, go for walks, spend time with my loved ones. I learnt to chew rather than swallow my food. Help out at home, guide and play with the children, read, listen to music and hymns, share stories and fantasies and a hundred other things. I had done many of these things before but grudgingly or almost robotically. Now I savoured them.

I do not regret the years I spent working very hard, for I learnt many things,  achieved some spectacular results, numerous setbacks and  discovered my potential, my flaws and essentially myself, but it was always to be greater, reach higher, move faster. It was always more and more of everything.

I met many fascinating people and worked with amazing colleagues who taught me much. Many liked me and some even loved me but I was too busy and oblivious of their affection.

I still work hard. I teach, consult, and mentor individuals and organisations,  and many other things, but all with greater meaning. No issue is too minor, nor is any relationship too demanding.  A joy fills my being, for I no longer live life but savour it.

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"The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it.” 

 - W.M. Lewis

A Cup of Coffee

A group of alumni, highly established in their careers, got together to visit their old university professor.

Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life.

Offering his guests coffee, the professor went to the kitchen and returned with a large pot of coffee and an assortment of cups porcelain, plastic, glass, crystal, some plain looking, some expensive, some exquisite - telling them to help themselves to hot coffee.

When all the students had a cup of coffee in hand, the professor said: "If you noticed, all the nice looking expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is but normal for you to want only the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all of you really wanted was coffee, not the cup, but you consciously went for the best cups and were eyeing each other's cups.

Now if life is coffee, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold and contain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change. Sometimes, by concentrating only on the cup, we fail to enjoy the coffee in it."

Enjoy the quality of life which is the coffee. Don't let the cups drive you.

I wish to acknowledge with thanks the contribution of this article to my happy and successful friend  Anoop Desai.