Women, not the weaker sex

Acharya Chanakya (B.C.E. 375 -283) was an Indian monk with a profound understanding of life and its myriad dimensions. He has provided the world with many treatises on numerous subjects and within them countless gems of wisdom.

Many of these gems of wisdom, challenge our modern perceptions of life. Modern perceptions are actually impositions on an innocent humanity by intellectual, religious, political that have vested interests.

I came upon this nugget of Chanakya's wisdom.

"In comparison with men, women have,

Double the hunger,

Four times the bashfulness,

Six times the valour, and

Eight times the sexual desire"

If this be true then why is it not so evident. This is because a woman conceals her desires and wants, behind her bashfulness, something which men cannot do.

A woman is normally not aggressive, however when necessity demands it a woman can throw up her fearless nature revealing her valour scorching the object of her fury, as many an adversary has discovered.

As a brother, a father, a husband and a son, as a colleague, friend, and employer I can certify from my experiences that women are definitely not the weaker sex.

Women, without them men are but a fraction of themselves.

For a man may have his will, but a woman has her ways.

Where the women are loved

 

Nowadays one sometimes reads about incidents in India of mistreatment and disrespect of women, and that can never be condoned. However just like a few trees do not define a forest, an aberration does not define a civilisation.

Contrary to common belief, in India, as in most agrarian societies the Goddess the provider of all things, as mother nature, has always been revered. In such societies the female has always been respected, loved and worshipped. Hindu and later Sikh tradition have always honoured women with the highest status of which women are rightly deserving.

Somewhere along the way, this valuable lesson which kept man and nature in harmony got disturbed. Influence of patriarchal and alien religions and cultures industrialisation, urbanisation etc. amongst other causes has taught man that nature and hence females are to be exploited for man's convenience and pleasure. Exploitation can never bring honour, dignity or love, only submission and resentment.

Our salvation and lasting joy can come only by loving and cherishing nature, which is manifested in the female.

Culture is shaped by both tradition and historical influences, and provides us many valuable lessons. Love, trust, and respect can never be legislated, or taught. Respect for women can only be instilled in the hearts and minds of our children by the example of elders and parents in every household.

It is not possible to impose values like respect, love and trust upon individuals, nor can it be taught in classrooms. Though this  is often attempted by the government, media, priests, schools, and civil society with little or no benefit except to enhance their own grandeur and power.

I can share what I have learnt.

If you are a man attempt not to understand them, rather try to cherish and respect the women in your life. If you are a woman, then accept them as imperfect yet honour, respect and care for the men in your life. If we do this the days of our life will be wholesome, because divine energies will reside along with us.

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* The Manu-Smriti, also known as Manav Dharam Shastra, is the earliest work on Brahminical Dharma in Hinduism. Manu-Smriti is believed to be the word of Brahma, the Creator and it is classified as the most authoritative statement on Dharma.

The scripture consists of 2690 verses, divided into 12 chapters.  It is presumed that the actual human  author of this compilation used the eponym ‘Manu’, which has led the text to be associated by Hindus with the first human being and the first king in the Indian tradition.

Men and Women, abuse and compliment

Men almost always abuse one another, but they rarely mean it.

Women almost always compliment one another but they rarely mean it.

Females make me nervous

                     
                             















I grew up in an all boys boarding school, and went to engineering college  where there were almost no girls. All the teachers were men. 

My interaction with females was very limited except for my mother a few aunts, my  two elder sisters and a few of their friends who only thought of me and my brothers just as little boys. For me females were alien.

I grew up with two ridiculous and extreme views of females. One they were pure, angelic, goddesses  and the other learnt from naughty books and magazines, that they were mere sex objects.

I made friends with girls but could never sustain a friendship with them because I could not understand them therefore unable to sustain a meaningful relationship. Those that I put on a pedestal as Goddesses usually found me dry and boring. Those I treated as objects mainly thought me uncouth and obnoxious. 

I thought I was an exception but many male associates, friends, and former classmates usually from God fearing, religiously inclined, good families held the same sort of stupid beliefs. Our noble opinions are shaped by romantic novels and romantic movies, history and literature.  Nowadays magazines, television, internet and cinema usually portray females as conniving, petty minded evil creatures. 

We men dehumanise females by either idolising them or by being dismissive of them.

Educationists and religious zealots may think it is good idea to separate males and females but it is unnatural and unhealthy. 
Boys and young men from segregated environments inevitably encounter difficulty in relationships and marriage. The most natural thing of engaging with women as colleagues, clients, and as friends always remain a challenge. They avoid females, and even if they do engage with them its often in a dehumanising manner. They cannot be respectful because they know nothing about the other half.

What can be done to build healthier societies?

Young children up to age 9 or 10 should all go to coeducational schools and playgrounds. It is sexually safe, and emotionally healthy. 

Young children are brutally frank and in these early years of their lives they are inquisitive and open. They have no hardened opinions save those planted in their innocent minds and hearts by teachers, parents and priests.

Just before the onset of puberty girls and boys may be separated until they are ready to go to college or go to work. Sexual attraction will be there, as it is perfectly natural, but it will be healthy, respectful and friendly. 

We talk of love, and building a better world, but how can we love humanity when we cannot be respectful or friends with half of humanity? 




Where there is no understanding there can be little respect. Without respect friendship is not possible. Love can blossom only if there is respect and friendship.

p.s.
What do I know about the problems and challenges that females from segregated backgrounds encounter? 
I don't know, I feel too nervous to ask them.