When society is doomed.

When you know that in order to produce, you need to obtain permission from men who produce nothing; 


When you see that money is flowing to those who deal not in goods but in favours; 


when you see that men get rich more easily by graft rather than by work, 


and your laws no longer protect you against them but protect them against you

......  you know that your society is doomed 

                                      - Ayn Rand ( Author - Atlas Shrugged)

How old is your son?

Kind and  helpful my friend Dr. Anil Lamba is also a brilliant teacher.  Author and producer of a range of educational courses particularly on finance, he often weaves stories into his program to illuminate a view.

Reproduced here is a real life incident he narrated during a program I attended.
Once while traveling by train Anil's co-passengers included a couple and their little son.

Midway through the journey the ticket checker  came and began verifying the tickets of the passengers. He checked the tickets of this young family. They had two adult tickets for themselves and a half fare ticket for their boy.

The checker smiled at the boy enquired from the father "Your son is handsome, how old is he?'

The father replied; "he is seven."

After the checker left, another co-passenger remarked, "You know  your son is rather small built for his age.  He does not look like he is seven.  You could have easily passed him off as a five year old or younger. No one would have known any better and you could have avoided spending money on his ticket ."  (Children below the age of five need not buy a ticket)

The father smiled and said "You are right, no one else would know, but my son would know. That my dear Sir, is something I prefer not to teach my son."


Those who want to know more about Dr. Anil Lamba can visit www.lamconschool.com

May I have your autograph?

It was two years ago when our son Pavit was in Mumbai and dropped in  at the Bharat Petroleum pump on Bandra Linking road to meet his young uncle Amarprit Sawhney (Amar).  They chatted for a while when they were interrupted by one of the employees. The employee was asking for permission to leave to go to the home of one of legendary Indian cricketer Sachin Tendulkar.

Sachin possessed a Ferrari car gifted to him by the Fiat company for Sachin's outstanding performance in one of the tournaments. The vehicle needed special fuel to operate and this was  supplied by the oil giant Bharat Petroleum (BPCL).  Amar's petrol station is well reputed for its excellent service and efficiency, therefore BPCL had requested Amar to personally take care of the select prestigious clients, such as Sachin Tendulkar.

Amar asked Pavit if he would like to meet Mr. Tendulkar.
Which right thinking youngster n India could turn down such an invitation?

They loaded the special fuel into the vehicle and they set off for Sachin's home.
As luck would have it, while the technician did the check up and pumped the fuel, Sachin strolled out from his house.

After exchanging greetings, they began to chat. Pavit recalls how modest and soft spoken the great cricketer was. They chatted about many things and then Pavit asked Sachin "I would have thought you more comfortable in a Mercedes car rather than in the simple cars parked in your driveway."

Sachin responded "We Tendulkars are simple folks, we believe in simple living." I have been presented with many cars icluding 37 Mercedes cars."
Pavit asked "Thirty seven Mercedes cars? How do you manage so many cars? Where do you fit them?"
Sachin replied " I do not  need to fit them. I have gifted them all to friends and relatives. You cannot believe how happy it made them and how much I enjoyed sharing my things with people I love."

He then offered Pavit to sit in the Ferrari. Pavit was ecstatic with the experience.
After a while as Pavit and Amar  were leaving. Pavit could't resist asking Sachin for an autograph. When Sachin saw that Pavit had nothing to take the autograph on he smiled and said "Wait here, I will be right back."
Sachin returned a few minutes later with a note book pulled out a leaf  and autographed it in front of Pavit.

Gushing with excitement at having met such a great and true man. He called us up at home to share the experience.

When he returned home,  he narrated his experience to us in great detail.  I asked to see the autograph. He sheepishly said "I don't have it, I gave it to a friend."
Mohit his elder brother screamed at him " Are you crazy? Why did you do such a daft thing?"

Pavit said " I learnt many things from Sachin Tendulkar in the short time I was able to spend with him. I gave the autograph to my friend Akhil because it would mean so much to him"

It was another day for us to learn so much more about friendship, modesty and greatness.

Charitable and Happy

I often met Prakash when I go for my walks. A decent chap, he has rather unusual opinions on most matters because of which he and I often land up sparring. Our passionate debates on a wide range of topics sometimes provide me with interesting and alternate perspectives.

The government had just announced another steep hike in the already absurd fuel prices. A group of us sipped tea and complained like all good but impotent citizens. We bemoaned the declining standards of morals and character and the surging costs of living. Someone commented that the government actions would only increase the numbers of the poor and they would be hard pressed to make ends meet.

Prakash then made a statement which almost killed all conversation. "Who is to say who is  poor? Many of these beggars are just to lazy to work and find it easier to beg for a living. In addition many  of those who claim they are poor are not even worthy of helping for they are  aggressive and rude. I will never give anything to a beggar again, they do not deserve the charity they receive for they are ungrateful" he said in tone of finality.

After a minute of silence in our conversation, I asked him why was he so agitated.

It seemed that whenever Prakash tried to be charitable, he always had an unpleasant experience. He narrated his previous day's experience.

__________________________

Prakash's wife Chanda is deeply religious. She visits the temple everyday. She offers prayers and then gives alms and food to the poor who invariably congregate outside such places.  

Prakash the dutiful husband always accompanies her driving her to the temple and back. One day unable to find parking space, Prakash happily volunteered to stay in the car while Chanda went for her daily appointment with God.

Lost in thought Prakash was soon jarred out of his reverie by a persistent tapping on his elbow. A middle aged woman stretched her palm out at him, begging. Prakash had received some good news the previous evening and felt expansive. He dropped ten rupees into the outstretched hand.  The lady looked blankly at Prakash and said, "I am hungry, give me more."


At that time 10 rupees was enough to have a working meal. An astonished and upset Prakash flew into a rage. He ticked the woman off and she in return cussed and  hobbled off with a scowl on her face. 

That was the incident that a visibly upset Prakash shared with us. He said "instead of being grateful the horrible woman abused me."

I felt sorry, but could not figure out for whom. An example of a charitable act, resulting not in joy but in disgust.


I asked Prakash whether he expected anything in return for his act of charity 
"Of course!" he said, "I expected a smile, some  acknowledgement maybe even a blessing, but the woman  .. she was simply horrible"

While professional expectations heightens our performance and therefore important, the opposite applies in our personal life. Expectations from love, friendship, parenthood, service, prayer, charity etc. almost always disappoint. This is because with every expectation comes the seed of a disappointment, that of unfulfilled expectations.

This is why our elders used to say, "Do good and forget about it" I have learnt that lesson long ago, I hope Prakash will do so too in the near future.



This habit of mine of analyzing everything and reflecting on various encounters and interactions compelled me to think about charity and giving. Here are some thoughts which I share with you.

We can give of our possessions, but greater still is to give of ourselves our time mind and heart.

What goes around comes around. Have we not be given much? So why do we hesitate to give?  

Have we not yet learnt that nothing is really ours? Neither this wealth nor these relationships, not even this body is ours for long.  A day will come when all that we possess will be taken away from us. Is everything not transient and temporary?

In our materialistic world we are always doing deals, forever transacting business in give and take selfish relationships. This could possibly be the root cause of much of our unhappiness.

Unhappiness is caused by unfulfilled expectations. So to be happy we must either be able to fulfill our expectations or have no expectations. To be happy in giving, one must make the choice what to give and how to give it and then unconditionally give with no expectations of some glory, benefit or profit.

Our well may be small but it is likely to be full. Yet when we hoard the water, is it not a thirst that is unquenchable? Let us not be like King Midas who had so much gold but remained hungry and unhappy.

Would it not be wise and noble if we ask nothing in return for our charity and assistance, for our love and our friendship? I believe we would be happier and maybe even carefree. Let us stop demanding to own the souls of people we help and love. Let us not burden people with the crushing weight of our charity.



If you really want the biggest bang for your charity work, just try and give and expect nothing in return. 

Try it. Give truly unconditionally and 
experience how your spirit will soar to the heavens, for you would no more be a human, but an angel.